By: like black butterflies August 8, 2018March 1, 2020 Loveauthenticity, radical self-love, respectability politics, unapologetically black, words of wisdomLeave a Comment

On Being Unapologetically Black…

The price we pay for being ourselves is worth it. –Eartha Kitt As kids we were regularly admonished to “use your inside voice” (or some variant of that phrase) by some older matriarchal figure, usually a grey-haired teacher–a librarian in my case–whenever you got just a little bit too wound up in your conversations with…

By: like black butterflies July 28, 2018March 11, 2020 Learnessay, racial terrorism, racism, society, state sanctioned violence, systemic oppression, white supremacy, whitenessLeave a Comment

Stand Your Ground. Can We Stop Lying to Ourselves?

Anonymous 1 it’s really very simple, if you don’t want to get shot – don’t start violence. If someone is rude to you because you are in a handicapped spot, its not ok to shove them. He escalated that confrontation to physical violence and that’s the repercussion. Is it unfortunate? absolutely – that whole situation…

By: like black butterflies February 22, 2018February 26, 2020 Laughblack face, Carnival krewes, Carnival Time, costuming, for the culture, Journey to 30, locavore, Mardi Gras, New Orleans, New Orleans music, NOLA eats, racism, sobriety1 Comment

All on a Mardi Gras Day…while sober

I was sober this Mardi gras as part of my year-long commitment to sobriety. Everyone was very concerned for me about how it would be without alcohol; how difficult it would be to just drink water (I don’t drink soda) while everyone else was in their own giggling, tipsy world. But it really wasn’t a…

By: like black butterflies January 7, 2018March 11, 2020 Learnactivism, Black Lives Matter, equity, essay, institutional racism, police violence, public health, racism, research, society, structural racism, traumaLeave a Comment

The Impact of Police Violence is Far Reaching and Long Lasting

Last week I, as many others, looked for every update that could be found about Erica Garner. Horrified at the possibility of police violence claiming yet another victim. Hopeful that she would pull through. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case. At 27, a woman who had to watch her father get choked to death on TV…

By: like black butterflies November 12, 2017March 3, 2020 Laughart, communication, intentionality, memories, relationships, writingLeave a Comment

The Lost Art of Writing

Remember when we used to write to each other with a pen on a piece of paper? We wrote notes and letters in our everyday communication, we sent cards for every occasion with personalized messages in addition to whatever was pre-printed, and we actually wrote out thank you cards? Everything is electronic now, the art…

By: like black butterflies November 29, 2014March 11, 2020 Learnblack history is American history, Black Lives Matter, cooperative economics, essay, police violence, racism, respectability politics, society, white supremacyLeave a Comment

Our Humanity Is Worth More Than Their Bottom Line

I hadn’t planned on updating my blog yet. I’ve had something else in the works but wasn’t ready to release it yet. But in the wake of this disgusting, though unsurprising, decision not to indict Darren Wilson, I had to disrupt my plans. We all know the stat…every 28 hours a black person is killed…

By: like black butterflies July 13, 2013February 26, 2020 LearnBlack Lives Matter, fear, racism, society, state sanctioned violenceLeave a Comment

License to Kill: The Illusion of a Free and Democratic Society

I have a difficult time describing to people from other countries why I don’t love my country. Why I don’t uphold it to that same beacon of hope and social inclusion that it’s portrayed to be. Why I’d almost recommend that immigrants, especially of African descent, go to any other developed nation but ours, even…

By: like black butterflies May 12, 2012December 27, 2019 Losecommunication, language barriers, racism, stereotypes, Taiwan, travel, xenophobia2 Comments

Hand Signals & Calculators

Stop for a moment and think about all the personal encounters you’ve had in the U.S., or have witnessed, with non-English speakers. Think about the level of impatience had with, or complete dismissal of, that non-English speaking person. We are, as a nation, pretty ridiculous. As are some other nations when it comes to non-speakers…

Be

My 20s were like the caterpillar stage: the caterpillar’s purpose is to feed, to consume everything in sight, to grow and store until it outgrows one skin and develops into a larger one, repeating this process 4 to 5 times, expanding to nearly 100 times its size. But a caterpillar can’t travel very far, only…

Be Intentional

Where did the title “like black butterflies” originate? Over the holidays in 2011, I was sitting at the kitchen table with my sisters trying to come up with a new blog and a new blog title. We threw around different combinations of words that were related to what I wanted to blog about and what…

Be Moved

i lost a whole continent. a whole continent from my memory. unlike all other hyphenated americans my hyphen is made of blood. feces. bone. when africa says hello my mouth is a heartbreak. because i have nothing in my tongue to answer her. i do not know how to say hello to my mother. –african…

One Day at at Time…

By: like black butterflies May 24, 2020

Lovepersonal growth, radical self-loveLeave a Comment

I’ve been in a funny mood all day. Yes, times are strange, we’re in a pandemic, we’ve been home for months, and things will likely never be the same as they were prior to this. It’s unsettling. But today, in particular, I felt strange: I watched youtube videos of gospel music. I’m not religious. I…

Pleasure Activism

By: like black butterflies January 26, 2020March 1, 2020

Loveauthenticity, books, radical self-loveLeave a Comment

This is from a chapter authored by someone who experience childhood sexual abuse, and although that has never been my experience, the paragraphs at the end of the chapter deeply resonated with me. This was specific to the author’s timeline of arriving at college, this narrative could just as easily have been superimposed on my…

Book 20: Salvage the Bones–Jesmyn Ward

By: like black butterflies January 28, 2019March 7, 2020

Learn30 to 30, black girl magic, black women authors, books, Journey to 30, review, well read black girlLeave a Comment

This book hurt my feelings. I finished reading it and was pouting. And sad. And I wanted to reach over and hold my dog and cry until he squirmed out of my arms and looked at me like I was out of my mind before he promptly got up and resettled himself on another part…